longest day ever...

Some days I look at everything I've done in a day and think that it might be better for my health if I had spread it out over two days. Crazy. Today was one of those crazy days where I stop and wonder if I really am going to get everything done. And then I do something silly like spend 3 hours in the green room talking to some freshmen. (it's weird talking to them... we're on opposite ends of the college experience -- they're just beginning and I'm 66 days from being done) I got a lecture (or at least it felt like it) today about my priorities and how I'm not going to be a children's theater producer the rest of my life, but I am going to be a musician. It was suggested that I should re-think how I spend my time. So I've been thinking... and really, I wouldn't have done anything differently. True -- there's no telling what would have happened if I took all the time I put into theater and spent it on music, but really, I don't think I would be happy. Call me crazy, but I'm not a 24/7 music geek. I tried for awhile -- it just didn't work. But now I feel bad, like I've let people down by not giving the music everything I had. But if I had given it everything I would have had to sacrifice other things I love, and that's not really fair to me. I guess it's just weird to be looking back at what I did in college and seeing how differently things turned out than I had expected them to. Not really different, just a few big things that are quite the opposite of what I would have expected -- a few people that I'm super close to, and a few that I wonder if I'll ever get to talk to again. So strange... sad... unexpected. Talking to my new freshmen friends tonight was interesting -- we were talking about graduation -- them from the perspective of just graduating high school and me looking forward to college graduation. Same fears, risks, worries -- but they landed safely in college and I'll land safely somewhere too -- hopefully in the continental USA