the princess talks...

Some days I look at everything I've done in a day and think that it might be better for my health if I had spread it out over two days. Crazy. Today was one of those crazy days where I stop and wonder if I really am going to get everything done. And then I do something silly like spend 3 hours in the green room talking to some freshmen. (it's weird talking to them... we're on opposite ends of the college experience -- they're just beginning and I'm 66 days from being done) I got a lecture (or at least it felt like it) today about my priorities and how I'm not going to be a children's theater producer the rest of my life, but I am going to be a musician. It was suggested that I should re-think how I spend my time. So I've been thinking... and really, I wouldn't have done anything differently. True -- there's no telling what would have happened if I took all the time I put into theater and spent it on music, but really, I don't think I would be happy. Call me crazy, but I'm not a 24/7 music geek. I tried for awhile -- it just didn't work. But now I feel bad, like I've let people down by not giving the music everything I had. But if I had given it everything I would have had to sacrifice other things I love, and that's not really fair to me. I guess it's just weird to be looking back at what I did in college and seeing how differently things turned out than I had expected them to. Not really different, just a few big things that are quite the opposite of what I would have expected -- a few people that I'm super close to, and a few that I wonder if I'll ever get to talk to again. So strange... sad... unexpected. Talking to my new freshmen friends tonight was interesting -- we were talking about graduation -- them from the perspective of just graduating high school and me looking forward to college graduation. Same fears, risks, worries -- but they landed safely in college and I'll land safely somewhere too -- hopefully in the continental USA

Grrr... back to new ulm. I broke up the trip a little bit -- just drove to the grandmother's yesterday and then the rest of the way today. It actually makes the trip a little longer, as my grandma's is only 1 hour closer than school, but it is 2 hours from my grandma's to school... but it's interstate all the way to my grandma's, and I like the interstate better. Roads were icky today but I made it. Leaving yesterday felt more final than it has in the past. It was my last spring break. It should have been more productive, but I think I'll be ok. It's just one of those milestones that makes the whole graduation thing more final. Crazy. I guess I'm ready to jump back into school again, but I don't know for sure. So much to do, so little time. I feel like I should have more done for Children's Theater than I do... but I'm sure it will get done. It has to. Crazy.

I have a confession. I did not vote in the last presidential election. Call me crazy, lazy, uninterested or just stupid, but I did not fill out the absentee form in time to vote. Previously I wasn't really all about admitting this, however I think I might be ok with it now. Last week a teacher in Colorado got in trouble for comparing Bush to Hitler but not thinking about the other side of the story which made me wonder how someone could compare our president to such a horrible person. So, a bit of research and thinking was done, and I'm now glad I didn't vote. I would have blindly voted for Bush. Lesson learned? Think for myself before the next elections... and actually vote. Yeah... when I'm an actual resident of a state it'll be easier.